Nighttime disturbances.

I'm not sure why this is happening, but for at least 3 nights this week I have been having a series of pretty violent nightmares. Nothing cohesive mind you, and hard to remember them after I wake up (not the I really want to remember them anyway). I'm not sure why these are happening, as I don't get nightmares on any sort of regular basis. There is only one relevant factor I can point to, that being my blood sugar being somewhat lower than normal before I go to bed. I have to give myself a dosage of long acting insulin prior to bedtime, so I am wondering if it is dropping lower during sleep than normal, hence causing my neurons to fire wildly, and causing my brain chemistry to play nasty tricks on me.

Unfortunately, there was no constant theme throughout these horror images, other than the fact that all involved a woman that was trying to do me harm. As I have read Jung in the past, I am tempted to try and find the symbolic nature of what all this represents (I'm staying away from Freud. Don't even want to go there.). Female looking to destroy me...hmm...will have to look this one up.

I did however have one moment of terror, in which I woke up practically hyperventilating. It took me a good 2-3 minutes to get my bearings, and when I did, the entire imagery of what got me into this state was gone. I couldn't remember what exactly it was I was dreaming about or why. Maybe this is the brain's way of protecting itself against trauma, or maybe I unconsciously chose not to remember.

Ah well. Maybe it's true that sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

To sleep, perchance?

I have read in the past on many an occasion that as one grows older, the need for sleep grows less and less. It doesn't mean that one does not need sleep period, but the amount that one needs grows shorter. I have to wonder if that is starting to affect me.

Now granted, I get to sleep a about 3:30 in the very AM on work nights, but as my commute is 30 seconds to my bedroom that is not as bad as it seems. The problem is that I only get between 6-7 hours, and that is often not enough for me. I find myself napping during the day for an hour or more to play catch-up. So last night, on my day off, I went to bed at the normal hour of about 11:30. (I personally wish I had been out with some friends, but it was one of those days, and I was actually pretty whipped.)

Well, I slept fine, until about 6:15, (oh-dark-thirty in my book) when I found myself wide awake. I didn't want to be, but there I was. I got up, fired up the coffeemaker, and just rummaged about the house. I wanted 8 hours, truth be told, but it seems I have to be beyond tired in order to get that, or pump myself with some Benadryl, which I don't like to do unless absolutely necessary.

I have to wonder if it is possibly a symptom of my circadian rhythm being off as well, being used to going to bed much later than I did. I still can sleep relatively deeply, but not like I used to. I quite literally slept through an earthquake once. I visited LA for the first time in 1980, and slept through a 5.0 tremor in my hotel room.

Well, here's hoping tonight goes better. Sunrises are beautiful, but I don't want to see them regularly. I did that for many years, as while a paramedic, I worked the 7am-3pm shift. I am more of a sunset person anyway, and a night owl.

Hoot, hoot.